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  • Part 4: Chapter 16: Unicorn Strength

    C: Yes, Honesty, I will keep doing what I know I must do, although I do not see any reason to believe I will be successful. Most people don’t listen to me and I am unable to say the right words at the right time. I stutter when I am nervous and people judge me for my autistic disabilities or because I am not a Christian or because they are turned off by my vegan and transgender ways.

    H: Yes but your message is not for those people. Some people are not willing to listen no matter what you say because they don’t want to know the truth. It’s not because of who you are or your perceived weirdness that makes them not listen. It’s that they don’t want to give up what they have.

    C: But doesn’t progress require everyone to all come to an agreement? Can there really be peace or an end to suffering if everyone is in their own reality? If half the people see the truth while the other half either remains ignorant or doesn’t care about how their actions affect others, I will never see the world that I would like to see. A world where everyone’s life is respected equally and where we can all be happy. Everyone! Human, cow, sheep, pig, chicken, black, white, male, female, intersex, rich, poor. All of us are the same! All of us are one! How then is it that we are still separated and opposing each other?

    H: I have some bad news for you, Chastity. The world may never be as perfect as you would like it to be. Nonetheless, you have seen that life has value even though it is full of suffering. The truth is that every good thing is defined by the very opposite of what you would like. You came to this understanding that all of us are one connected life but you came to this knowledge by great pain. Had your life been easier you might not be the person you are now. The suffering you experienced led you to seek the truth in ways that others cannot because they have too much to lose. Do you remember the story of Jesus talking to the rich young man who asked how to inherit eternal life?

    C: The time where Jesus said “It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God”?

    H: Yes, that’s the one. What do you think Jesus meant by that statement?

    C: That those who have things they want to keep have a hard time changing because they don’t want to lose what they have. Jesus told the rich man to sell what he had and give the money to the poor and then come and follow him. After that he just walked away sad.

    H: Yes. That’s because a person may not want to hear something because it means that if they accept it, they have to give up everything they have. They could lose friends, family, their job, or even killed for speaking the truth or living according to the truth they have been given. For this reason, narrow is the way that leads to life and there are few who find it. The more you have to protect, the more afraid you are and less willing to change when you find new information.

    C: Is this why all the most important people I know in my life have endured great suffering and are often alone without friends or family to support them in hard times?

    H: Yes, because those are the people who went against the majority and expected actions, appearance, and beliefs of their culture. They have lost much but gained so much more, although they don’t always see it. It’s not easy to stare the ugly truth in the face and yet still go on living. This is often why so many of the very best people either die by suicide or end up using something else to distract them from the pain of their own lives or the pain they witness.

    C: I see. I already didn’t have all that much to begin with and it was easy for me to try things that no one else would be willing to do. I didn’t value my life and so I was willing to take huge risks and do the craziest things. I joined the Navy, I left Christianity and found my own way, I became Vegan, I got a full time job even though at the time I didn’t have a clue how I was going to get to work each day when it was 9 miles away. I fought doctors until I found someone willing to remove my testicles, I published my books which contain almost my entire life history! I did it all because I had no fear!

    H: Yes, and always remember to keep this memory of how you did what you did in the past. Many times yet in the future you will be tested even beyond anything you have experienced so far and there will come a time when you will be tempted to tell less than the truth because you will have things and people in your life that you are afraid of losing. But when this happens remember that you have the strength of a unicorn and when these times come you will do what you know is right even if everyone around you tries to tell you that you are wrong. Fear not, neither be dismayed, for I am your Unicorn. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my Silver Horn of Truth!

    After the unicorn said these things, Chastity awoke from the dream and understood where she came from and where she was going. She had the strength to not let anyone tell her who she was or what she should be doing. She pondered over everything Honesty had said.

    C: Yes, Honesty was right. Living in truth is the only way to truly be alive. I will do my best to remember the message of Honesty the Unicorn and not to do something because I am afraid but because I know I am doing what feels true to me. When the time comes, I’ll know what is right. And I have a feeling that I will see Honesty the next time I need the strength of a unicorn.

  • Part 4: Chapter 15: A Better Way

    C: Yes, Honesty, I suppose it would be a unicorn that would be my god. But what does it matter that you are here? What does it matter if you are good and true? What does it matter that you love me? The suffering of others continues and the world goes on with humans continuing to hurt each other and trillions of other animals. What you tell me now will not change the world nor give me the power to do anything about it.

    H: Yes the world is full of much evil and humans who do wrong. I won’t disagree with you there, but do you require the world to be perfect and good all the time?

    C: Of course, who doesn’t want that?

    H: Those who delight in doing wrong. They want their freedom to do wrong just as much as you want them to do right. So who has the final say in what happens? You or the other billions of humans?

    C: People would do well if they followed my example. The world may never be perfect but I believe it could be a lot better. But even so nothing could make right the the suffering of countless beings who had painful lives and painful deaths. The idea of all those who have been here and suffered is more than anyone can count. I do not see how a happy ending to this story is possible.

    H: And yet, even though you know that, you still see the small good in others. Even those humans who do wrong and even those who mistreated you, you still respect their lives enough that you do not wish harm on them.

    C: Of course, because I do not desire anyone to suffer. Nobody, no matter how bad they are or what they have done should be hurt. I only wish for them to change their ways and see that there is a better way.

    H: And do you believe that everyone has the potential to change for the better?

    C: I do not know, but since I do not know what the future holds, I never know if even the most evil could see that they were in the wrong and then completely change and be entirely different.

    H: Let’s do a little thought experiment. I know you are against abortion just as you are against the killing of everyone else. But let me ask you this, if you somehow had the power to go back into the past an abort someone that you knew for a fact would cause you or other great harm, would you choose to kill them to prevent them from hurting others?

    C: No! Just because someone will do great evil does not mean that I have the right to end their life. They still have the right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness!

    H: And why do you think everyone, even the most evil of humans have these inalienable rights? Is it only because this is written in the United States Declaration of Independence?

    C: No, it is because I, Chastity White Rose hold these truths to be self-evident just the same as the writers of the declaration of Independence.

    H: And what evidence is that?

    C: Because I want to live, I want freedom, and I want to make myself happy however that may be. Since I want these things for myself I must protect these rights for others or I am in violation of the golden rule which has always been my principle. So, no matter how evil people may be, I would not intentionally kill them because I do believe there is a better way to fix the world. I do not know if everyone can change or which people will and won’t stop their violence but if I have changed as much as I have in my life then I believe that some of them will change for the better.

    H: And that is the power of life! As long as one is alive then have the liberty to change and improve. Even though the world is full of great evil, you have the power to see this, Chastity. This is what makes you strong enough to go on. I expect to see great things from you as you try to talk others into a better way and pursue your own happiness even though there are many things you are sad about.

    C: Yes, however I may feel at times like giving up, I still believe that unless I try, I’ll never know. I am willing to talk to anybody willing to listen about the way that I live in the hopes that they do follow after my example and walk in the vows of Chastiy, Truth, and Ahimsa. I know many will mock me and reject me as they already have, but the White Rose is stronger than that. I will not be stopped by others because this is my life and I will do what I want to do. I want to make the world better than it was when I got here.

    H: “Blessed are ye, when men shall revile you, and persecute you, and shall say all manner of evil against you falsely, for my sake.” – Matthew 5:11

    C: I remember that verse. That seems mysteriously relevant right now.

    H: It is! You see I am Truth. Right now you know me as Honesty the Unicorn, but long before you met me people already persecuted you because you spoke the truths that you knew to be self-evident. People don’t usually like the truth because it makes them feel guilty knowing that they did wrong and so they try to silence you by making you feel that you are somehow wrong for sharing the truth with them. They do this thinking it will take away the pain in their hearts but it never does. So people persecute you for telling the truth as you see it and they make up lies about you and call you sexist, racist, or call you a sinner thinking that they are better than you because they call themselves a Christian and surround themselves only with people who agree with them and never speak what they really feel inside. So I say, blessed are you because you are stronger than all of them that revile you for speaking the truth. You are stronger than you know, Chastity, and you are making more of a difference than you can see. So keep doing what you are doing and pursue your happiness! May the Horse be with you!

  • The Good, the Bad, the Pretty

    The Good

    I have much to be happy about in life in general. I published my recent book: “Chandler’s Honesty” which explains more about my life than anything I have ever written or said in my videos. I also have a new computer and it is far faster than any machine I have ever had. My excellent friend in England bought it for me so that I can play Minecraft with him in good quality and other modern games. I also hope to use it to start recording my video podcasts that I do usually once a week.

    The Bad

    I am back at work now but even after two months since my injury my right knee is still hurting. I am very afraid of losing my job if I can’t make quota at work. But more than that I want to avoid reinjuring myself. I may have to get another job and this is possibly the worst time in history to be switching jobs because of this Covid-19 nonsense. I don’t want to have to change jobs but I know I don’t have the knees I had when I started this job 2019. Shelving is a real knee killer and I understand why so many people quit this job. But I don’t give up easily and I will work smarter rather than harder.

    The Pretty

    Although things are sometimes bad and I am in a financial mess, I believe I have important work to do with my writing and podcasts. I am trying to promote my books as much as possible and record podcasts with important people so that I am making the best use of my time however much or little there is. And at least I am recovering with my knee injury and I feel generally very good and healthy. Even more so since the lack of testosterone in my system has made me feel emotionally calmer even though I still have times of stress about my job. I am happy about everything else except my financial situation but I am hopeful because I have been in worse situations than this but found a way to make life better.

  • Sunday Podcast of 2-7-2021

    I recently did a livestream with many guests. It was one of our best so far and I have made it available on multiple platforms.

    https://rumble.com/vdnsan-sunday-podcast-272021.html
    https://www.facebook.com/1190355304/videos/10224186657672730/
    https://youtu.be/qHl_EmmhqlI
    https://www.pscp.tv/w/1OwxWVnjddVJQ
    https://www.bitchute.com/video/PvrJdPrceAtJ

    The secret of how videos like this are possible is because I recently discovered a new livestreaming service. Streamyard allows me to have shows that are streamed live and people can comment on them while they are being streamed and recorded. It’s now the fastest way to get a message out in video form and I am slowly learning how to use it.

    https://streamyard.com/

    At this time I am concerned about free speech and I do not like that posts are being deleted because they don’t agree with the political views of social media platforms. You may have heard about what happened to force Parler to be shut down. I want to give people a way to speak who may be unable to otherwise. If you have an unpopular opinion and are shut down when you try to write or speak about it, let me know and maybe you can be a future guest on my show that I normally plan to be doing on Sunday nights when I am home.

  • Feeling Pretty Lately

    This post is sort of unusual for me because I’ve never been one who cared very much at all about the physical appearance of my own body or the bodies of others very much. But this is what I am thinking about right now. I have noticed that I am generally more pleased with my appearance since my orchiectomy.

    When I took this picture, the intention that night wasn’t to take a selfie. I was just testing my Android phone to try to record a Minecraft video by placing it in front of my new monitor.

    However when I had the phone camera facing me I was so pleased with how I looked that I took this picture anyway. I haven’t always been happy with how I look and gender dysphoria has been the main reason. But I do like what I see now much more than I used to. I’m not sure how much of it is because I look different or because how I feel about myself has changed somehow. But I really do feel pretty.

    It could be actual changes in how I look or just hormones messing with my mind but it’s a good thing. Also, I do seem to have boobs growing and I know it’s not just my imagination because my mom and doctor mentioned it first before I said anything to them. The lack of testosterone has probably resulted in the start of breast development which is not uncommon. It seems my natural estrogen is pretty high even though I am not on HRT. My doctor says my hormone levels are healthy at this point so I have nothing to worry about at least for now.

    I do find something mysterious though. When my doctor was feeling my chest and exclaimed: “You have boobs girl!”, I felt a sudden rush of happiness. I’m not sure why though. Never really did care much about boobs in my life but I guess evidence of physical changes or at least the fact that I’m starting to look less like a male is a happy experience for me and just feels right somehow. But for me, the most attractive and important part of anyone is their face. So I just feel like saying:

    I am beautiful! No matter what they say! And so are you, whoever you are reading my post!