Category: Uncategorized

It is day 4 since I had my orchiectomy and I am at my mom’s place recovering well. However it turns out that I wasn’t sown together with stiches. I was basically glued together. Although I feel normal, I have to remember that I can’t squat down nor try to lift huge things because I risk breaking the glue open and bleeding if I overdo it and stretch the skin too far it would be deadly. I can’t sit down in a chair either or Im sitting directly on it. So I lay on my belly or back and talk to my mom and watch funny stuff on the TV I bought her a few weeks ago.
I will lose some income because I can’t go back to work yet. But the great part is that this is a one time thing. The testicles are gone and as far as I know I have no life threatening things like heart disease, diabetes, cancer, or any of that. I don’t expect to be having any more surgery in my life if I can help it.
For the past two years I was in extreme pain from restricted blood flow,dead veins, and twisted spermatic coords.
In fact the pain was getting so bad that I was seriously having bad thoughts about castrating myself with my sharpest knife to end the pain, which would not have worked because I would have simply died of blood loss and shock. But that is how bad the pain was and the pain I had after surgery was still less than what I was experiencing before.
So I worked my butt off trying to work my job and save money and vacation hours. The hardest part was trying to pretend that I was ok at work when I was in major pain and could not really talk about it nor do anything about it.
Dr. Hadley Wyre really saved my life and gave me relief from my pain and now I have a feeling things will be alright. I just overcame the hardest struggle I ever went through. I went to so many urologists who did not take me seriously and expected me to live with the pain or just accused me of making up the pain and assuming that I only wanted my testicles removed because of gender dysphoria.
It would have been nice if I had received help years sooner than I did. I’m only where I am because of the company Brillient giving me a full time job with excellent health insurance and the fact that Hadley Wyre is a nice urologist who actually listened to my needs and did what I asked without policing my decisions of what I wanted done or questioning my identity. And also many thanks to Psychologist Ryan Cox who referred me to Hospital Hill KC Urology clinic.
I also want to thank all my coworkers for putting up with my crankiness without understanding what was wrong with me. Thanks to my best friends who were there for me in my most difficult moments.

On 9-17-2020 I had my orchiectomy after a long fight of trying finding a doctor willing to do it. I am currently recovering and taking the pain medicine they prescribed me. I can’t really walk well or lift heavy things until I’m healed and stitches are removed. When I have a follow up appointment Ill ask the doctor to help me fill out the paperwork for FMLA and Short Term Disability so that I only go back to work when I’m at my best.
But after recovering everything will be great because I will not be experiencing the pain I had to endure for over two years. I’ll do even better at my job when I return.
The testicles, spermatic coords, and the scrotum are all gone now and I will be able to focus on the good parts of my life.

I translated my spinning polygon routine by looking at the C version and copying everything over to BASIC syntax. It also draws a checkerboard behind the polygon because I left the code from my previous project there.

REM BASIC8 port of Chastity's Regular Polygon

'the width and height of the program
'this is set in stone by the BASIC8 creator so these never change
width=160,height=128

'declare my 2 color palette for the checkerboard
palette=list()
push(palette,rgba(0,0,0))
push(palette,rgba(255,255,255))

rem new section for declaring the polygon variables
cx=width/2 'center x of the polygon
cy=height/2 'center y of the polygon
radians=0 'the current rotation angle of the polygon
radius=height/2
polygon_points = 8
polygon_step = 3 'for how the points are stepped through,applies to star polygons
polygon_color=rgba(255,0,0)
'arrays of x and y points
dim xpoints(polygon_points)
dim ypoints(polygon_points)

'old section that does the checkerboard from my other project
rectsize=8
def update()
index=0
y=0
while y<height
index1=index
x=0
while x<width
rectfill x,y,x+rectsize,y+rectsize,palette(index))
index=BXOR(index,1)
x=x+rectsize
wend
index=BXOR(index1,1)
y=y+rectsize
wend
rem end of checkerboard section

'fill the point arrays with correct values using trigonometry
i=0
while i<polygon_points
f=i/polygon_points
angle=2*pi*f
angle=angle+radians
x=sin(angle);
y=cos(angle);
x=cx+x*radius;
y=cy-y*radius;
'print i;
'print "angle=",angle;
'print "x=",x," y=",y;
xpoints(i)=x;
ypoints(i)=y;
i=i+1;
wend
rem now all points are set up.

rem next draw triangles
i=0
while i<polygon_points
i1=(i+polygon_step) mod polygon_points;
trifill cx,cy,xpoints(i),ypoints(i),xpoints(i1),ypoints(i1),polygon_color
i=i+1;
wend

'change the rotation
radians=radians+0.03

enddef
update_with(driver())

I have a checkerboard function/program that I wrote in C and have used as the foundation of my BBM library. I translated it into BASIC8 without much effort because drawing rectangles to the screen is trivial.

REM BASIC8 port of Chastity Checker 
palette=list()
push(palette,rgba(0,0,0))
push(palette,rgba(255,255,255))
width=160,height=128
rectsize=8
def update()
index=0
y=0
while y<height
index1=index
x=0
while x<width
rectfill x,y,x+rectsize,y+rectsize,palette(index))
index=BXOR(index,1)
x=x+rectsize
wend
index=BXOR(index1,1)
y=y+rectsize
wend
enddef
update_with(driver())

Here is a screenshot of what it looks like when run inside BASIC8.

What is particularly great about this program is that it uses several elements such as while loops,x and y geometry coordinates,and a 2 element list of colors which can be changed to make all of the squares of black or white into any color combination of RGB.

I discovered BASIC8 on Steam and it allows a similar programming environment to what QBasic was for me years ago. I was 14 and able to start programming simple things including drawing circles,rectangles, and triangles. Having graphics as part of the standard library was a huge benefit to me at the time and one that I sacrificed when I switched to C as my primary language.

https://paladin-t.github.io/b8/docs/manual

But having BASIC8 could be a fun retro programming experience to allow me to relearn BASIC and perhaps even make games or cool animations with it like I do with my C programming except that I will already have a standard set of functions to save time and won’t have to translate most of my own BBM library into it.

Here is the code of my first program.

REM My first program with BASIC8
REM Hello World
width=160,height=128
def update()rectfill 0,0,width,height,rgba(0,0,0)
text width/4,height/2,”Hello World”,rgba(255, 255, 255)
enddef
update_with(driver())

Here are screenshots